The Marauder's ABC's
by siriuslysmiling
Summary: A series of oneshots based on the Marauders and their shenanigans throughout their years at Hogwarts. Fun, or maybe mishap, is sure to ensue.


Author's Note: Hey guys! Thanks for dropping by my humble little story here. It's my first one, so be nice. Technically, it's not even a story-story, it's just a collection of oneshots about the Marauders based on the alphabet… Each chapter starts with the next letter of the alphabet and goes all the way from A to Z. Not every chapter is in the same year, the years are pretty much scattered – some in first, some in seventh, some in third, etc… And since I'm a beginner here, my sister Tang Si Ming-Yue (aka Tangy) –

Tangy: Sup. BD

Me: - is here to help me out some. You should check out her stories, too!

Tangy: Although, be warned, that while I am an avid HP lover and fanfic reader (LilyXJames all the way!), all my stories are for Avatar: The Last Airbender.

Me: Which is an awesome show.

Tangy: Yes.

Me: Anywho, I guess that's it, so let us start the story!

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, any of its contents, or anything related to it. And also, I don't own any ABBA songs either…

**The Marauder's ABC's**

A is for Annoying

It was a lovely day at the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. It was one of those days where one just couldn't help but stare out the window in awe. The leaves on the trees were falling to the ground with willowy grace. The lake was clear enough to see the giant squid lazing on the bottom floor, his tentacles occasionally poking the watery surface to create tiny ripples. The temperature wasn't all too hot, and it wasn't all too chilly either, but rather a serene balance between the two that no one seemed to mind. Students were running about the grounds, laughing and playing in the soft, green grass, enjoying the beautiful day to be had.

Unfortunately, the Marauders were a bit busy.

James was currently serving a detention for hexing Snape without apparent reason. In James' defense, though, "The little bugger's a right git."

Peter was in the hospital wing. During James and Snape's hexing incident, the first shot – fired by James – just happened to accidentally hit the passerby Peter. Again, in James' defense, "Who's moronic enough to walk between me and Snape?"

Remus was bent over stacks of homework piled high on his desk. He had missed quite a bit of work while in the Hospital Wing after the last full moon. But in James' defense, "What? I don't have anything to do with Remus and his schoolwork!"

Sirius, however, wasn't busy _per se. _He merely had nothing to do since all of his friends were busy. And when all of his friends were busy, Sirius got bored. And when Sirius got bored, things got bad. Very bad.

Both Remus and Sirius were in the Gryffindor first year dorms. Remus, as mentioned earlier, was sitting as his work desk, catching up on all of his missed assignments. Sirius was lying on his back atop his bed with his legs crossed and his arms resting beneath his head. For the past hour, he had been doing nothing but staring at the ceiling.

The only sound heard throughout the room was of Remus' quill scratching against the parchment. Sirius didn't think he could stand it anymore. Maybe he could stand 15 minutes, but most definitely not 60. It was unacceptable.

Sirius sat straight up from his previous position. He glanced around the room, looking for something – anything – he might be able to use for entertainment. And that was when the sandy-haired boy captured his attention.

"Remus."

Remus seemed to not hear the other presence in the room, for he kept on writing. Sirius humphed and tried again. "Remus."

No response.

"Remus. Remus. Remus. Remus. Remus. Remus. Remus. REMUS. Remus? Remus. Remus. Remus –"

"What do you want, Sirius?" Remus said, finally giving in to the incessant nagging that was his so-called friend. _More like pest,_ thought Remus, bitterly.

"Why do you have to do boring ol' homework, Remus? You could be doing much more productive things, like, oh I don't know, spending time with _me!"_

Remus sighed. "Sirius, I don't have time for this. All of this is due tomorrow, bright and early, and I'm barely even halfway through. So just sit there like a nice little boy and be quiet, yeah?"

Sirius glared at him before flopping back onto the bed. Remus went back to work, scribbling away once more.

That is, until he felt a soft jab in his side. He instinctively swatted it away as if it were a gnat, but only earned a much harder jab than before. He swatted it away once again but this time was rewarded with a hard smack in the back of the head.

Remus yelped in pain, turning around to find Sirius hiding a flyswatter behind his back and looking off to the side, whistling nonchalantly. "Sirius!" he shouted, rubbing his head, "What in Merlin's name is wrong with you!"

Sirius seemed to only just notice Remus. "What? Remus, I've no idea what you're talking about. What in the world happened to your head? You poor dear."

Remus glared. "You know you hit me, Sirius. And I –" He stopped all of a sudden and shook his head. "Nope," he said. "No, I'm not giving you this satisfaction. I am going to just turn around and do my work and hope you get it through your thick head that I really am busy right now, too busy to be attending to your need for attention."

"I hope you know that I find that degrading," Sirius said, chucking the flyswatter at Remus' head, but Remus was already hard at work again and refused to acknowledge the thrown appendage.

Moments passed in silence and Remus was convinced that Sirius had finally just decided to leave and bother someone else for a change. Smiling to himself, he was able to write his Transfiguration essay with much more enthusiasm.

In fact, the sun coming in through the window was very warm and pleasant. He felt as if he could just take a nap… but he wouldn't, he had much too much to do. But still, it was all very comforting, especially the light and gentle tugging he felt on his head. Yes, this was nice –

This was when Remus realized that hair tugging itself was not a normal occurrence.

Whipping around, he saw Sirius jump back, holding his hands up in defense.

"What are you doing to my head?" Remus shouted hysterically. Feeling his hair, it was twisted and turned in some kind of pattern repeatedly throughout his head.

"Well, it's an interesting story," Sirius started, sitting on the edge of his bed and crossing his legs as though this were all very intriguing. "I went downstairs to the common room to find an actual interesting person where I found Lily sitting on the sofa, braiding Alice's hair, so naturally, I poked her with a flyswatter. After she told me to stop doing that, I asked her how she did that, so she taught me how to braid hair! Wasn't that nice of Lily, Remus?"

"Oh, just _so_ nice…" Remus said, his eye twitching. "And you just had to come practice on me then?"

"I thought it'd be funny. Lily and Alice agreed. That reminds me, say cheese!" And he quickly snapped a picture with a camera that seemed to come from nowhere. Remus could only blink in horror. "The girls wanted to see this, but they figured you wouldn't want to come down. So I ever-so generously offered to snapshot a picture for them. Wasn't that nice of me, Remus?"

"Get out."

"Pardon?"

"Get _out,_ Sirius! Let me work!" Remus threw a rather large and heavy textbook at Sirius who scrambled out the door just in time for the book to hit it. Unfortunately, the book was also very fragile and fell apart as soon as it made contact. Remus could only twitch his eye in response.

After removing his braids and being alone for almost an hour, Remus felt that maybe Sirius really and truly was gone now. And that was when he heard the tapping on his window.

Remus, already knowing well-enough who it was, crumpled his Charms worksheet in anger and stomped to the window, thrusting it open so with so much force that it swung slammed into the wall outside.

"_What do you want, Sirius?"_ Remus yelled, almost hysterically, down to the figure far below.

And Sirius started singing.

"_If you change your mind,  
I'm the first in line.  
Honey, I'm still free.  
Take a chance on me!  
If you want me, let me know,  
I could –"_

"_WHAT?"_ Remus yelled, astonished. _"Are you flipping kidding me, Black?"_

"Doesn't it seem like the kind of song you'd serenade someone with, though? Like outside beneath a window? Like I am now? I personally thought it was all very lovely."

"Oh yeah, Sirius, just _precious,_ just _bloody darling!"_ And with that Remus shut the window.

A moment passed before the window was flung open again. _"And quit annoying me!"_ Slam.

Sirius merely sat for a minute. "Well, that was quite rude. People yelling on such a nice day out is so annoying. _Isn't that right, James?"_ Sirius added, shouting down to James who was being made to rake up leave by the edge of the forbidden forest.

"_Sure thing, buddy!"_ James answered before Filch muttered to get back to work.

Sirius shook his head. "Terribly annoying."

A/N: Sooo, my sister pretty much wrote this chapter… I wrote the first couple paragraphs though! …Well, she edited them though… Anyways, hope you liked it! Read and review, please! Reviews are, like, my BFF.

Tangy: Besides me.

Me: Besides her.

**SiriuslySmiling :)**


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